StatiC
I am finally at a place where i feel nothing. I wish for nothing and I aim to do nothing.
It is very simple really when you finally put your mind to live lightly.
Or perhaps im just a result of a wild crazy 2009, my brain cells are unable to cope with the amount of thoughts running thru it. My brain decided to go galacial and take time off by giving me nothing to feed on. I currently exist with a transparent glass wall around me. All my emotions are confined to a 10 min period where life becomes that shade of foggy white on a chilly morning.
And its really annoying too, for in this stage, although u have no expectations whatsoever and any passing feeling is just a millisecond in that empty existence, you seem to lose the ability to even talk about anything. I welcomed the loss of feeling but not the loss of words. Loss of communication is grave for those who are around you, because it is a foreseable reason for disasters to come. I dont want to say its solitude, it just that, my conversations have become too repetitive and disorderly for my liking, so my brain (once again) took command of my being and decided to silence those lips from uttering the same none sense.
I decided (maybe after a friend saw this n reminded me that i occupy a few milli nano MBs on a server) that i shud include some interesting events into this blog of mine.. things about my life. Maybe, in 20 years or so, someone might use it as a marker of history and I would finally have fullfilled my duty as a blogger : someone will eventually read and comment on something. Afterall, isnt this why we blog?
Anyway to continue with this sudden idea, a friend called me last night, almost 8 years of complete disappearance, partly because we decided to become adults .. We were together in school, we shared so many things (funny + sad).. We both enjoyed brief marital existence for a while and we're both extremely single at the moment. So 8 years of disapperance, prompted him to call me last night to ask me if i know any girls around for him to marry .. Usually im an enthusiast of such requests and go hi / low to find something suitable, but all i kept on thinking last night is: Why me ? I suggested a few names, promsied to call back in a couple of days if i remembered anything and ended the call. But i couldnt help think what wud push someone to ask a complete stranger such a question ? (for those of who are unfamiliar with our culture, this is called match making). Of all the people he knows, why has he selected me? Revenge, love, familiarity or just plain stupidity !
For anyone who knows me personally and the crazy things that have been happening in my life lately, they realize the irony of the situation.. 2 weeks away from the end of an epic disasturous year: 2009
